Final Girl…✧/5

Title: Final Girls
Author: Riley Sager
Start date: July 18, 2017
Finish date: N/A…Abandoned

✧/ 5

Warning! Some spoilers ahead.

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I’M SO SAD AND DISAPPOINTED. I was really excited for Final Girls because not only did the premise sound interesting, but I also have not read a really good thriller/horror this year yet.

To simply put it, I couldn’t care enough about the story or the characters; especially not pill-popping heroine Quincy. When you find yourself not giving a single fuck about the “tragic” protagonist, then there’s something clearly wrong, and unfortunately, throwing the book out the window and jumping ship is the quickest solution.

Final Girls is about the aftermath of a massacre similar to that of Friday the 13th slasher films. We follow Quincy Carpenter who is struggling hard with trying to live a “normal life” with her boyfriend. Everything is fine and dandy until a fellow final girl Lisa randomly commits suicide which triggers a series of events that cause Quincy to revisit her own trauma.

What a hot mess of a book.

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Alive, by Scott Sigler…✧ /5

Title: Alive
Author: Scott Sigler
Start Date: August 21, 2015
Finished: August 30, 2015

✧ / 5

I couldn’t even finish enough chapters to warrant a full hate post for this book. I’ll just start off by saying how much this book annoyed me, which was a shame because the premise sounded very interesting.

This was so obviously written by a man and you notice it right away since the first few pages are dedicated to breasts. Breasts. Galore. I don’t know about you all but yes boobs are quite fascinating and lovely and bouncy, but I’ve never examined my own with such intensity and wonder as these characters have.

There’s not just one or two scenes where these girls are playing doctor and probing their giant breasts (yes I’m exaggerating a little bit but I kind of have to since this is such an annoying book, have I mentioned that yet?) AND also, why does EVERY girl have such gigantic boobs in this? CALM DOWN with your porno school girl fantasy Sigler. These females are running around with their tits bouncing and little school girl skirts flailing about. You just know that Sigler had a hard-on while he wrote this.

Note: This review contains no spoilers.

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Magonia, by Maria Dahvana Headley…✧ /5

Title: Magonia
Author: Maria Dahvana Headley
Start Date: Aug 13, 2015
Finished: Aug 19, 2015

✧ /5

I know people are going to come after me with torches and pitchforks, but I did not like this book at all. Here’s to another gorgeous cover and interesting premise that ultimately falls shorts and ended up being a disappointing read. I gave this a 1.5/5. I just don’t have a way to represent the half point.

Let me just say that I really, really, really enjoyed it at first (when I had somewhat of an idea what was going on and the world building was stable and coherent). I loved how sassy Aza was and how each family member was portrayed, especially her sister for not giving a rat’s ass and treating Aza like a regular human being. I had so much hope for this book before she was inevitably beamed up to the Amina Pennarum and readers were sent in whirlwind of “Wtf is happening?!” and “Can I stop reading this now?”

With the way the story started out, I feel like this would have been much more successful as a contemporary YA novel. The whole fantasy aspect just fell apart when she boarded the ship. It was like a different author took over the writing and didn’t know what she was doing, so all she could do was slap on description after description of what could be fascinating aspects of the story but never actually lingers to tell us more. I was bombarded by so much information and I hate that. I couldn’t savour each detail properly because Headley was already moving onto the next piece of information. The way the second half of the book was written is exactly like what you would get if you opened up a pop-up book; everything is presented to you all at once, and don’t get me wrong, it’s incredibly pretty, but so overwhelming at the same time.

Warning: Spoilers ahead!
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